Potluck Potato Salad

• Loosely fill your serving bowl 2/3 with potatoes - that's how many you need. 
• Cut the spuds in half so they cook more evenly. Boil them, then drain and let cool overnight in the fridge. 
• Boil half as many eggs as potatoes. Peel them AFTER they've cooled, or suffer the consequences.
• Cut up your spuds and eggs. Kitchen shears are a lot faster than a knife and cutting board, and less clean-up.
• Mix eggs, spuds and mayo in the bowl until everything is lightly coated. Add mustard for super tanginess!
• Search your fridge and pantry for extras: celery? green onions? olives? radishes? peppers? capers? just about anything you can chop small can be mixed in and add character.
• THE RELISH QUESTION: Some people love sweet pickle relish in their potato salad; others think it's of the Devil. Make your choice and live with it.
• THE BACON QUESTION: Yes, a little well-cooked and finely-chopped bacon will make your potato salad more intense. But is it worth alienating the vegetarians? 
• Season to taste. (It's ok to taste as you go along - just be sure to always use a fresh spoon so we're not sharing your spit!) Almost any green or red spice will go in nicely. Try to balance hot (red, such as paprika or pepper) with cool (green, such as dill or cilantro). 
• By now, your bowl should be about full. It's time to top off! Put in the effort to decorate the top with leftover sliced veggies (e.g. spell out something appropriate, like "HAPPY BIRTHDAY") or sprinkle a festive pattern of paprika and dried parsley. You're a grown-up - it's ok to play with your food! 
• Cover and keep cold until serving. I'll be first in line to try your creation!