Sunday, May 24, 2015

Sunday: Contemplating Effectiveness

This upcoming week presents enormous opportunities and risk for me.
On Wednesday at 1:30 I will be negotiating, through mediation, my future in my home, with Kris, through a mediation program.
At other times, I will be developing Veterans And Friends of Puget Sound and The Atrium Project through a critical period.
It is absolutely essential that I be at the top of my game.
This begins with self care:

  • Rest
  • Nutrition
  • Mental Preparation and Maintenance.

It begins with getting enough sleep, and that means putting myself to bed on time, regardless of the siren call of the internet.
It continues with nutrition - the temptation of carbohydrates are to be resisted by simply not eating outside of my kitchen, and by having none of the problem foods in the kitchen.
It succeeds with early and frequent attitude checks: from my morning affirmations and goal-setting to my frequent self-checks:

  • Am I being positive? 
  • Am I being kind? 
  • Am I remembering what my goal is in this interaction?

At the end of this week, I want to have a clear plan for my home, my family and my career. These depend on clear and positive relationships with my family and career teams.
Before every planned interaction, I think about:

  • What are my goals?
  • What are the goals of every other person in this interaction?
  • What are the underlying mental and emotional attitudes of every person in the interaction?
I must remind myself that many of the people with whom I work are damaged, often by alcoholism and/or PTSD (I have my injuries as well, not as serious or crippling as some, but enough that I cannot claim any sort of superiority.) I must not expect them to react as I do, to accept the fairness of my actions, even to act in their own self-interest if their damage take precedence. To the contrary, I might have to give precedence to the various elephants in the room if I want to achieve my goals.

And that's o.k.! 

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