Sunday, December 11, 2011

On Being A Guinea Pig

We Also Serve Who Only
Lie Down And Donate!
Why fight orcs online?
You may bring Alzeihmer's down
Wielding placebo!

We aren't all Einsteins;
The easy way to do science:
Human guinea pig!

Feeling unwanted?
Google "Healthy Volunteer"
Now you're popular!

The Ph.ds wait;
Their Nobel Prize depends on
Your humble fluids.

Retained Forever,
My Great Future Monument:
Small Prostate Sample.

Blindness, Cancer, AIDS;
Humble roles in their defeat -
What greater glory?

We also serve who
(Nameless, fameless and happy)
Only stand and donate.
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For maybe a decade I've participated as a healthy volunteer for one or more science projects a year. They've been fun, on the whole; I don't have the head for science but I love making my contribution. I've had my vision tested, the bones in my head MRI'd, my sensitivity to pain tested while playing Iceworld. Currently I am taking either Simvastatin or a placebo in a test of the way proteins in my bodily fluids change over time, a finding which it is hoped will be one footstep in the journey of a thousand miles to defeat Alzheimer's.
I highly recommend everyone who can participate in projects such as these. Most of mine have been through the University of Washington's Health Volunteer page. We can't all be geniuses, but we can all make our contribution; without us, medical science stops and then where would we be?

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