Professor William McCloundy, the noted archeologist and world traveller, has recently deciphered inscriptions at the Great Pyramid in Giza, more than three thousand years old, that foretell the astonishing role of "The Dark-Skinned One With Large Ears" in unleashing "The Jade Helm Warrior" upon the People of the Lone Star. Most shocking of all is the role of the Mart with Walls.
Professor McCloundy became interested in archeology after making his fortune in construction finance. His second career appears to be destined to be as noteworthy as his first.
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